i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
