oh god the rape fog is back!
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize