What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize