We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Randomize
