Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Dear god my vagina.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize
