Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
