So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
