I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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