I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
