I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I think my vagina is haunted
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Randomize
