take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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