distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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