Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Randomize
