It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
