Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
