How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
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