As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
