dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
