Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
That accounts for only three of the penises
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
