So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Blood and glitter go together right?
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Randomize
