I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize