Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
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