some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
