We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
i think i have two assholes
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize