I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
