And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
