Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize