You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I came so hard my ears popped.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
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