Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
There's even glitter on my cock...
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