i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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