Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
