Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
