i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
My life is pants optional.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
