New invention idea: vibrating tampons
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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