i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize