Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
