Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
