Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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