What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize
