You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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