I'm really into asian looking animals
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
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