I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
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