she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
