His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
