we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
