He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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