Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
