Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
