i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Randomize
