none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Plan B is the new Plan A
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
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