so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Randomize
